How I overcame Encopresis

Of all the questions I’m asked as an Encopresis survivor, the most popular one is: “How did you overcome Encopresis?”

When I was 15, the family home got renovated by expanding the current bedrooms and installed an ensuite with my bedroom. Although it didn’t stop my Encopresis at the time, I do remember noticing a significantly smaller amount of soiling after the renovation completion. It took a while, and it took longer before I actually noticed myself the soiling had stopped (6 months to year after soiling). No one else noticed or commented it gone, or anything like that. Life went on reguardless.

I can’t pinpoint if it was the combination of Paraffin Oil use at night, drinking more tea (English Breakfast) or minimalising stress. It was a long time ago. As my stools became softer (less huge at least) and more frequent in passing, my body slowly got into a new rhythm. Although for several years going to the toilet once a week became the “norm”, admittedly it was a lot better than not going in 10 days.  Sadly my tummy won’t ever be flat because of Enco and the magacolon I have, no matter how hard I train at the gym, I’m ok with it.

For many families this condition is more complex in how to deal with it, and what are possible triggers of it. What are your experiences with this? If you have any questions or comments feel free to post them below or you can e-mail me:

Have a wonderful week ahead everyone 🙂

“Dimity meets a Dinosaur”

When I was in Year 3 (age 7 years old), there was a national competition where students were asked to write/illustrate their own original story. While some chose to have their story printed (on paper, cut for the pages) and do their own illustrations..I chose to both write by hand and illustrate my story. Just like all the other kids around me, I was into the Dinosaur-phase, my favourite being the Tyrannosaurus Rex (no idea why, it just was). I decided to call my story, “Dimity meets a dinosaur” (quite appropriate).

The story was about a girl called Dimity, whom meets a Tyrannosaurus Rex, become friends and do things together including playing Cricket and video-games (Nintendo, I never had one but always did want one). At the end they got married, had babies (how? I will never know but it’s what was in the story) and that was it. I’m not an illustrator so the pictures weren’t special but I tried my hardest, but I paid more attention to making my writing as perfect as I could.

A couple of months went by (honestly I have forgotten how long exactly, but long enough for a competition), and I found out that I came second in my division for the competition. The prizes for the competion (at least what I and the others received that won) are: a gift certificate with the local bookshop, some free children’s books, a certificate (I think) and reading the story out loud onto the local radio station. My consolation prize at the time was that I had the Chicken Pox. I remember clearly being all spotty and itchy, standing in line with the other kids and shaking someone’s hand before receiving a book.

Sadly now I have lost my only copy of the book, although fortunately still have a a copy of the recording from the radio. When I was in Year 1 (5 years old) I received a medal from the Government for reading over 100 books in a short period of time. Books, Book Week, reading/writing, libraries, author meetings, etc are a huge part of my life. I’m always making notes when I hear, imagine or read something interesting and have them compired in a safe spot for my writing adventures. I’m never giving up on my dreams, never have then and I never will now. My journey started early.

It’s fair to be Fair (skin)

For many years, I have been constantly asked or commented from friends or people I know with the suggestion of me getting a tan or “why don’t you tan?”. I have fair skin. I burn easily and quickly, shed skin like a snake, then literally go back to white again. When I was really young I didn’t like my freckles, but over time as I met more people with them I got used to it and accepted my freckles quickly after that.

There are several websites and television commercials with information about “slip, slop, slap” (something lost at schools when they send you to do sport in mid-day sun at hottest time of day for several hours) and being sun smart about skin cancer. There are other commercials with the slogan, “There is nothing healthy about a tan”. The tan is the result of the skin creating a special layer to protect the body as all the other layers have been killed/burnt off over time. Last stage of defence. Some people are more comfortable and confident with a tan…..why can’t people accept I’m happy with fair skin? Also, fair skin doesn’t turn tan from the sun, so clearly a solarium will do nothing to it too (I’ve never tried anything like that, and never tried a spray tan before either).

When performing onstage I look more whiter under the stage lights. It would be one of the few times I would consider getting a fake tan (that and my wedding day..unless I have to for an acting job). I’m happy to stand proud at a tiny 5″2 (in height) and say “I’m happy and confident to have fair skin”. Would being tan make me appear more attractive/sexy to the opposite sex?

I’m confident in my fair skin, and I’m happy with that. Otherwise what’s the point of saying “love the skin you’re in” if you have to change it to suit someone else? If you’re tan, great! If you’re not, that’s great too!

Let me know what you think about this topic.

My worst day with Encopresis

think outside the box

I thought I would share with all my readers what I consider to be my worst day, I ever had, with Encopresis (yes it’s included in my book). It’s all true and as close in detail as I can remember. It was the year 2000, and I was 13 years old.

My day began like every other. Waking up, getting dressed, breakfast, etc (the normal morning routine). School started at 8am. The first period went ok far as I remember, however it “started” by second period (which was science). For the entire hour of the lesson I was trying so hard to concentrate on whatever was being taught, but I kept on having everyone around me (in a class of 30 students, you do the math) sneering at me. Saying horrible things like “you stink”, wiping their noses in that “you stink” way, snarling their nose up. It was horrible. I couldn’t smell myself (nor could I feel it so I have no idea when I soiled my underwear, and no spare clothing/underwear). When recess was on, I spent the entire time alone and crying. Recess might’ve only been for half an hour, but for me it was forever. The next 2 hours of other lessons (maths & english I think) were no better.

After lunch was Indonesian. I work very well by myself on a task (which is a good thing), shows how reliable I really am and teachers trust me. However the teacher put me in a separate room by myself (in the little office next door) for the rest of the day (an hour’s lesson). It was then that I could smell myself, but only a little. I didn’t know how bad the soiling was, nor could I do anything if I could. What choice did I have? The worst fear was knowing I was going to be in deep trouble (and a few unchoice words) when mum was going to pick me up from school. I can’t remember why I was asked to be in the separate room, I can’t remember the excuse the teacher used except something to do with the comments about me.

Siren rang for end of school. I told mum what happened…she support them, not me. ‘Poo you stink” she said. Raising her voice. “Why do you keep doing it?” “I’m sorry. I don’t know why”, but my tears couldn’t save me. No one did that way. “No wonder people are embarrassed to be near you. Why didn’t you have spare clothes?” (I didn’t have any with me that day…unfortunately the truth doesn’t set you free, it imprisons you). Home we go, my crying my heart out. The anger and horrible look in her face, and the disgraced horrible look on everyone else’s faces. If you can imagine that, you’ll have a smidget of an idea how I felt and went through that day. All alone.

Home we go, off to put clean underwear and clothes on. Initially put soiled underwear to soak (really heavy too, just my luck), and then scrubbing it by hand til it was all gone as best I could. Every time I had to scrub and clean it, as punishment, everytime I cried and hated it. I hate it so much!!

I still had to do my homework, and go back to school the next day (it was a Tursday). The things I have learnt from all this:

1. Always make sure your child has a spare set of clean clothes, and several spare sets of clean underwear (and plastic bags to put them in).

2. Let the school know what exactly is happening (especially if your child has been diagnosed with Encopresis and you know what it is).

3. Teachers should be stopping the bullying, not encouraging it.

4. Believe in your child with Encopresis…your child isn’t going to lie too often about it, it’s too painful.

5. Why couldn’t that day be a Saturday?

6. I love my family, and I don’t blame them for how they handled it. xx

I’m an Encopresis survivor…and this is my story. My story about my worst day with Encopresis. 10 years later that one day still hurts. I don’t want anyone else to go through this alone.

Feel free to e-mail me:

The magic within us

If you haven’t noticed already, there have been some changes implemented to my blog. The first one is it now has it’s own domain name (although will take you here), it’s URL is now: . Some other changes are a background and a few other things (new improvements to come).

Although I had other ideas of names for the domain, including “iamfreetobeme” and “uniquelyyou”, they were already registered by other users. I love magic (especially illusion magic), and even with encopresis you can still find that “magical something” that makes us truely unique. Whether it’s a quirk, a gift or talent, to each of us there is a magic…what type of magic it is is up to you to find. Also “themagicwithinus” is gender neutral, at least I think so. One of my dreams as a child (and still is to this day) is to be an Illusionist‘s assistant.

Welcome to my blog for 2013. I hope you enjoy reading and sharing it as much as I do in writing it. When I have other noticable updates (including the ability to e-mail me via this blog), then I will make it known to you. Enjoy, keep safe, never give up on your dreams and stay true to yourself.

Swimming and encopresis

For me, even when I had encopresis, I never soiled while swimming. I learnt to swim like everyone else, have own pool and swim at the beach. Not a problem for me (I’m not a strong swimmer however). I have noticed I would go to the toilet more after swimming, because the movement obviously helped to move the poo around (physical exercise is recommended by doctors to help the bowels to move along). If I had anything in the swimsuit it was old residue and nothing fresh or unhygenic. I NEVER soiled while swimming.

Any parents concerned or worried about it, I would definitely recommend swimming. Don’t let encopresis control your life (and your child’s life). It’s hard with all that’s involved and how hurtful people are when they misunderstand the situation, but you shouldn’t live your life in fear because of it. If I need to elaborate more on this or any questions then don’t hesitate to let me know. Let the children be free to swim and live a “normal” life. We don’t poop continuously 24/7…there are hours where nothing happens. Maybe go to the toilet before and after swimming.

Don’t let encopresis control your life (eventually you’ll learn to control it). Be strong. 🙂