For many of the parents whom have children with Encopresis, a common thought that I hear a lot of is wondering if it’s a result of bad parenting. It breaks my heart when I hear this. My own parents have also been accused of being a bad parent or to not have brought me up right. This is a majorly bad assumption. My parents raised me correctly and I’m proud to be their daughter (only daughter).
Due to the many different (and many unknown) triggers of Encopresis, it’s very hard to pinpoint what exactly is the individual’s trigger. For some families it’s a food sensitivity, moving house, death in the family (or other traumatic experiences) or simply something wrong with the body. Sadly not many people (including fellow survivors) open up publically about the condition, leaving others in the dark and feel so alone. Myths and misconceptions breed including false accusations from people that don’t truly understand Encopresis. Everyone’s story and experiences are unique.
Each child responds differently in different situations, and respond accordingly. Parents do as best they can with all the love and support within them. Encopresis isn’t a result of bad parenting, and it never will be. As a vocally proud Encopresis Survivor, I will support all parents through this condition as best I can (including supporting fellow battlers and survivors). If you as a parent is reading this blog, please be rest assured that you are NOT a bad parent. Encopresis does not mean bad parenting and I stand by that. It’d be easier if my parents knew what was happening, but that’s not what happened. They aren’t bad parents. They love me and support me. This is what a parent does. It’s not their fault my body wasn’t working properly. Only a small percentage of people in the world are diagnosed (and not diagnosed officially) as having Encopresis. If I’m not at a certain developmental point in my life as I “should” be, how come I have been measured with a societal standard that doesn’t know anything about personally having Encopresis?
You are not bad parents (nor are the parents that have raised you if you are an Encopresis Survivor/battler with this). I’ll go onto The Ellen DeGeneres Show (if she’d have me) and verify that Encopresis does NOT mean, or result from, bad parenting. I’m here for you. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
What are your thoughts on this? Have you been accused of being a bad parent because of Encopresis? How does it make you feel?
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